Do you find you spend a lot of your life rushing, rushing, rushing from one thing to the next? Do you constantly get outraged by the latest injustice or news coming through? Do you have problems relaxing at night? You might just be suffering from a cortisol ‘high’!
I spent most of my 40s being a masterful deliverer of everything! I worked full-time and ran my NGO full-time. I started helping a friend with a tech start-up. I ran a website, volunteered for another NGO charity, was always out with friends, adopted a dog. People used to admire everything I fit into my life, and I very smugly wondered why they weren’t doing more. I was on fire!
Until, I wasn’t. It felt like I had hit a brick wall. I felt basically numb and a little like the ‘walking dead’. Shortly after, I was diagnosed with Adrenal Fatigue. This meant my adrenal glands were exhausted. They couldn’t keep creating an insatiable amount of cortisol to keep me going, and I crashed—physically and emotionally.
Yes, living off cortisol had made me feel high, just like a drug. I felt more motivated and effective than I’d ever been. But it wasn’t sustainable. Living in ‘fight or flight’ is meant to be a temporary survival technique, not an everyday occurrence. Eventually, my body showed me that I needed to change how I lived.
Here’s how I started down the long journey of getting out of the cortisol ‘high’:
1. Stopped looking for the ‘high’
I’ve had to learn to live with other ways to replace the cortisol ‘high.’ Now I’m much more relaxed and ok with just doing life – ‘being’ rather than ‘doing‘. This includes enjoying things like sitting in the sun, cuddling my doggo, finding a great new book or series, catching up with peeps I love, going for a walk, or looking forward to a great show/event/travel. These ‘highs’ have shifted and changed over the years. It’s a constant balancing act to get the proper stimulation without tipping into unhealthy practices.
2. Taking regular breaks
I’ve had to unlearn that desire to push past my energy levels and keep going to get something done. This was classic behaviour when I ran under-resourced NGOs. This type of practice meant I needed cortisol to kick my system into higher gear. Instead, I’ve learnt to pack my hard work into 2 hour bursts at a time, with a break in between. Then I choose something infinitely less cerebral—counting avocados on my tree, walking the doggo, hanging out the washing, making a cup of tea. This helps me reset my energy levels and down-regulate.
3. Setting boundaries
I constantly shifted my boundaries while living off cortisol as an NGO leader—there was always SO much to do! I added new things every day to feel elevated and worthy! Now, I try and set up my week to better balance work, catch-ups, social, life admin, and relaxing times. I need to constantly measure how I’m doing in this area, as it’s now effortless to slip into ‘work mode’ continuously after years of running under-resourced NGOs.
4. Deep breathing
When I was running on cortisol, I became such a shallow breather. Instead of focusing on what was happening in my body, I was fully focused on external things around me. It has been pretty revelationary to learn to take a short moment to take deep breaths. My favourite is 4-7-8 breathing—breath in for 4, hold for 7, breath out for 8. This is a great relaxant.
5. Eating well and avoiding sugar/caffeine
Using artificial highs would lead me to crash a couple of hours later. It took me quite a while to see the link as it was much easier to grab the next thing to consume 2 hours later. I’ve worked hard over the past 18 months to reduce and eliminate as much processed food, dairy, and grains as possible (hey, I’m probably at the 80/20 level – 80% good, 20% not so good).
6. Getting endorphins from walking
Natural endorphins have become a much healthier way for me to live than generating cortisol highs. Walking is a great entry point into this new way of living. Sunlight and activity, especially first thing in the day, have considerably changed my energy levels, emotions, and motivation.
7. Building in reflection time
It used to be so tempting to fill my days with noise and activity that I’d struggle to sleep. I’ve been learning the need to give my brain space to sift, process, and file during the day. That way, I’ll be much more rested by the end of the day when it’s time to sleep.
8. Balancing the social times
Over the years of leading NGOs, I’ve swung from super social to a virtual hermit, depending on how my energy and stress levels were going! I’m still working on the right balance of social times to stimulate me with lots of conversations, exciting news, and chatting, and alone time where I’m down-regulating.
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Give yourself the gift of sleep
